Family Guy's Greatest Moments
by Dbzfreak60
Summary: All my favorite Family Guy Moments with some cartoon guest stars.
1. Part 1

Brian Griffin took some blind guy to go see a movie.

Brian: Alright. Watch your step.

In the movie, Dora & Boots are in the forest.

Brian: Ok they're they're in the woods.

Dora & Boots were walking.

Brian: The camera keeps on moving.

On the way, the witch was chasing Dora & Boots.

Brian: Uh I think they're looking for some witch or something. Uh I don't know. I wasn't listening.

Brian: Nothing's happening. Nothing's happening.

Boots: Where do we go next, Dora?

Dora: Let's check the Map.

Brian: Something about a map.

Blah Blah Blah...

Dora: What was your favorite part of the trip?

Brian: Nothing's happening.

Dora: We couldn't have done it without you.

Boots: Thanks for helping.

Dora: Gracias.

End Credits...

Brian: It's over. Alot of people in the audience look pissed.

In the show, they were really watching some Blaire Witch Project movie.


	2. Part 2

Stewie: AUUUUUGHHHHHH!

Stewie: Dear God I got to get a hold of myself. Look at me sucking Lois's breast milk off a dirty carpet. I'm as pathetic as Ed from Ed Edd n Eddy when he tries to read.

(Flashback)

Ed: Double D? What is this word?

Edd: Miley.

Ed: And this one?

Edd: Cyrus.

Ed: And this one?

Edd: Was.

Ed: And this one?

Edd: Born.

Ed: And this one?

Edd: In.

Ed: And this one?

Edd: Tennessee.

Ed: Oh! Hey Double D, did you know that Miley Cyrus was born in Tennessee?


	3. Part 3

Brian was driving a taxi.

Brian: Hello? Hey Lois. What's Up? Milk? Yeah I'll pick some up at the end of my shift. Oh Gotta go. First fare of the night.

He was about to give Johnny 2x4 and Plank a ride but he would rather get the milk.

Brian: I should really pick up that milk now before I forget.

He passed up Johnny.

Johnny: YOU SON OF A BIATCH!

Johnny gave Brian the finger.


	4. Part 4

Peter goes to Kentucky for some KFC and talks to Dexter from Dexter's Laboratory. Who works there.

Peter: Whoa Whoa Wait. Hold on. Wait a second. You're telling me that I flew all the way to Kentucky to get some of your

fried chicken and and the Colonel isn't even working today?

Dexter: Sir, the Colonel is dead.

Peter: What?

Dexter: I said dat da Colonel is dead.

Peter: Is Mr. Sanders in?

Dexter: I have already dold you dat de is dead.

Peter: THE KERNEL!


	5. Part 5

Stewie: Why the hell am I wearing a seat belt?

Lois: It protects you so you wouldn't get hurt.

Stewie: So I don't get hurt. That's the best you can come up with Woman.

Lois: I bought your Dora the Explorer soundtrack.

Stewie: Play Zum Gali Gali and get the (Bleep) out of my sight.


	6. Part 6

Lois: Peter, calm down. Everything is going to be fine.

Peter: Yeah I hope so. Cause if I blow this, I'm gonna have to go back to my old job at the Electric Company.

(Flashback)

Stan: D.

Peter: amn.

Stan and Peter: Damn.

Stan: B.

Peter: itch.

Stan: Bitch.

Peter: Bitch. I knew that. Slow it down.

Stan: P.

Peter: iss.

Stan: Piss.

Peter: Piss. Come on pal. It's my first day.

Stan: F.

Peter: uck.

Stan: (Bleep)

Peter: Oh that's it buddy.

Peter beats up Stan from American Dad.

Peter: Take that. Family Guy. Family Guy. Family Guy.


	7. Part 7

Nazz: The Filing is done, Eddy.

Eddy: Thank You Nazz. You are a valued member of our business team. And I will give you a raise tomorrow if you come to work without a shirt on.

Nazz: (Gasp) DAMN IT EDDY! (Slaps him)

Edd: Eddy. Let me try. (Clears throat) Thank You Nazz. You are a valued member of our business team and I think you would be more sexy without your bra.

Nazz: (Gasp) DOUBLE D! (Slaps him)

Ed: I wanna go. I wanna go.

Nazz: Last chance Ed.

Ed: Ok. Um. Nice ass.


	8. Part 8

Dora: We Mexicans like to give you Americans the power of friendship.

Kai-lan: The Mexicans may give you friendship. But to show you how we Chinese people care, we would like to give you all fruit baskets.

Eddy: That's more than we ever got from those dumb Canadians. CANADA SUCKS.


	9. Part 9

A Futurama scene is from Family Guy.

Fry: OOOOooo Bender? Mind if I have some Pie?

Bender: Uh Sure.

Fry: MMMmm Good. Hey pass the Cool Hwip.

Bender: What?

Fry: I said pass the Cool Hwip.

Bender: Did you say Cool Hwip?

Fry: Yeah.

Bender: You mean Cool Whip?

Fry: Yeah Cool Hwip.

Bender: Cool Whip.

Fry: Cool Hwip.

Bender: Cool Whip.

Fry: Cool Hwip.

Bender: The Hell's the matter with you? Why you saying it like that?

Fry: I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just saying I want Cool Hwip.

Bender: Cool Whip.

Fry: Cool Hwip.

Bender: Cool Whip.

Fry: Cool Hwip.

Bender: Cool Whip.

Fry: Cool Hwip.

Bender: It's made from Dandruff.

Fry: (Spat it out) UH YUCK.


	10. Part 10

Ed: JACKAL JACKAL. IT'S A JACKAL.

Eddy: YEAH IT DEFINATELY A JACKAL.

Dexter: JACKAL.

Spongebob: (Crazy) IT IS A JACKAL.

Dora: I think It's a jackal.

Billy: JACKAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL

Mandy: It's not a jackal.

Everyone: JACKAL JACKAL JACKAL JACKAL JACKAL.

Edd: Time.

Stewie: (Bleep) (Bleep) (Bleep) (Bleep) (Bleep) (Bleeeeeeeep) of a (Bleep) (Bleep) (Bleeeeep) IT WASN'T RIGHT THE FIRST TIME YOU ALL SAID IT. WHY THE (Bleep) WOULD IT BE RIGHT THE NEXT 27 TIMES.

Stewie pushed everything off the table and walked out.

Stewie: (Bleep)

Mandy: Told ya.


	11. Part 11

Peter: I tried finding my creativity like you said. First I took an Art class.

Everyone was painting Eddy naked.

Peter: (To Nazz) Am I...Am I suppose to draw his tiny penis?

Peter: Then I tried sculpting.

Everyone was sculpting Dexter Naked.

Peter: (To DeeDee) Am I...Am I suppose to sculp his tiny penis?

Peter: Then I tried music.

Peter: (To Edd) Am I...Am I suppose to conduct with my penis?


	12. Part 12

Peter: Well I'm gonna be watchin' it from the stands Lois. The Black Knight is just a big jerk. Just like that guy who fixed our vacuum.

(Flashback)

He was talking about Flint Lockwood from Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.

Flint: There you go. All fixed. Sorry about the first time I sold you it. Turns out a meatball from a machine I made was stuck in there.

Peter: Oh! Well did you leave it in there?

Flint: Uh...no.

Peter: ...You bastard.


	13. Part 13

Lois: Peter, Bonnie says Joe has been really sad about that robbery. Why don't you go talk to him?

Peter: Well I don't know. There's a game on.

Mac from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends appeared as an Angel on Peter's right shoulder.

Mac: Shame on you, Peter. You should go talk to your friend, Joe.

His imaginary friend Bloo appeared as the Devil on Peter's left shoulder.

Bloo: Don't listen to this nerd. You should definitely just grab a beer and watch the game.

Peter: That sounds good.

Mac got a gun and shot Bloo and killed him.

Peter: OH MY GOD!

Mac point the gun a Peter's head.

Mac: NOW GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER AT JOE'S AND CHEER HIM UP.

Peter: Look buddy, I...

Mac: MOOVE!

Peter: Aright Alright. Just...take it easy. Just take it easy man. Ev...Everything's cool.


	14. Part 14

Christopher Thorndyke is talking to himself while looking out his window at the moon.

Chris: Dora. I can't get her out of my head. Maybe I do have feelings for her. And I know she has feelings for me.

Yuso: Well well well.

Yuso was standing cool by Chris' Door eating an apple.

Yuso: Looks like somebody has a crush on Dora.

Chris' cheeks were red and he was blushing.

Chris: Come on. No I don't. I'm not in love with her. We're just friends.

Yuso: So you're not in love with a girl with green eyes?

Chris: HA! Her eyes are brown.

Yuso: HA HA! Thank you for proving my point.

Chris: DAMN!


	15. Part 15

Lois Griffin has houseguest problems about Jack Atlas from Yu-Gi-Oh 5D's. So she went to go talk to his friends Yusei and Crow.

Lois: Yusei? Crow? I know your friend Jack Atlas is our houseguest, but why doesn't he get a job?

Yusei: Jack? Having a job? Not possible.

Crow: Yeah! The Dude just can't do any job right. Like the time at the Pizza Parlor.

(Flashback)

Jack: Look. Is Jack Atlas not the finest sushi chef in the land?

Manager: We're a pizza joint you nut.

The manager fired him and Jack walked out the door.

Crow: Then there was that time at the Book Store.

(Flashback)

Delivery Man: Delivery!

Jack: I don't think so. I ordered the Kung Pao Chicken with a side of soup.

Manager: YOU NINCOMPOOP! THAT'S OUR STORE DELIVERY! NOT YOUR LUNCH! BEAT IT!

Jack: Whatever.

Jack was fired again.

Yusei: And remember that time he got fired from the cleaners?

(Flashback)

Customer: GGGRRRR! (Screams) WHAT'S WITH THIS HOLE IN MY SHIRT?

Jack: What? You said get rid of the stain and that's exactly what I Did.

Jack got fired again.

Jack: What do you mean I'm fired?!

He walked out the door again.

Lois: Where is he now?

Yusei: Across the street at his new job.

Dishes broke.

Manager: YOU'RE USELESS!

Jack: Oh yeah? Well you can't fire me cause I quit.

Stephanie: Jack wait.

Jack walks away.

Lois: I'm going home. Bye boys.

Yusei: Bye Lois.

Jack: You people are crazy. I did everything that you said.

Stephanie: You think clearing dishes means tossing them to the floor? (Moan) I think I'll just let Carly have you.

Crow: Oh Man. I guess I better pick up a double shift tonight.

Yusei: (Smiles) Hmph!

This was from a 5D's episode called "A Duel With Interest"


	16. Part 16

Yugi Moto, Jaden Yuki, Yusei Fudo, and Yuma Tsukumo from the Yu-Gi-Oh shows are about to do something stupid.

Yugi: Alright guys, since we're all evenly matched Duelists, let's settle it another way.

Jaden: How Yugi?

Yugi: With these. I bought us bottles of ipecac from a pharmacy. Whoever goes the longest without puking will not only become the #1 King of Games, but also wins the last piece of pie in the fridge.

They all drank it.

Yugi: Ok here we go.

They waited.

Yugi: How are you guys doing?

Yusei: Good. Good so far.

Yugi: Alright!

Yuma: Nothing yet.

Yugi: Nothing?

Jaden: Nope.

Yugi: Ok then. I don't mean to sabotage you guys, but I have to say that is some pretty good pie. My grandpa bought it from the- BBBLLLAAAAAAAAGGHHHHH

Yugi Lost.

Yuma: HAHA! The original King is out. NOW I'M GONNA FEEL THE- BBLLLAAAAAAAGGHHH

Yuma Lost.

Jaden: Uh Oh. I think I'm gonna puke.

Yusei: Well I feel fine. I guess I'm gonna- BBBLLLAAAAAAGGGHHHH

Yusei Lost.

Jaden: YES! I WIN! NOW I'M THE KING OF- BBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH

Yuma: BBBBBLLLAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH! OH MAN! YUGI? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT- BBBBLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH

Yugi: I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE- BBBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH FUNNY TO SEE WHO WINS! BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHH

Yuma: PLEASE! NO MORE. NO MORE- BBBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH

Jaden: OH MY GOD! WE NEED SOME HELP! BBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHH

Yusei: YUGI. GET THE PHONE! CALL 91- BBBBBLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHH

Yugi: GRANDPA? GRANDPA? GET IN HERE- BBBBLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH

They calmed for a sec.

Yusei: Ok. Ok. I think It's all gone. (Stomach Grumble) Maybe not. BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH

Yuma Whines like a baby.

Yuma: I WANT MY MOMMY. I WANT MY MOMMY- BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH

Jaden: THIS WASN'T SUCH A GOOD I- BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHH (Coughs) NO NOT AGAIN. BBBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHH (Cough) OH COME ON! BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH

Yusei: YUGI. YUGI I NEED YOU TO HOLD MY EAR- BBBBBBLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH

Yugi: BBBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH

Yusei: BBBLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH

They all stopped and coughed.

Solomon: Who wants chowder?

They all puked.

Yugi, Jaden, Yusei, and Yuma: BBBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUGGGHH!


	17. Part 17

Sam Puckett from iCarly was fake crying.

Sam: And that's when Clarence Thomas forced me into his chambers and showed me nude pictures of himself. (Sob) It was awful.

Judge: Ms. Puckett, we have evidence that not only have you never been in the same room as Clarence Thomas, but you haven't even been in the same state. How do you respond to that?

She bent over to the microphone and...

Sam: "Babba Booey Babba Booey. Howard Stern's Penis. Babba Booey Babba Booey.

Security Guards came to stop her.

Sam: Babba Booey."


	18. Part 18

Peter: Fine. Fine. I can see I'm not wanted here. Maybe I'll just find my own place.

Lois: Oh Peter. I just feel terrible about this.

Peter: I don't need your sympathy. I don't need anything. You know what? Maybe I just go take up my old job as a construction worker in New York. Although I never did get the Cat Calling right.

(Flashback)

The Ed's, Kevin, and Peter saw Nazz walking down the sidewalk all sexy like.

Edd: (Whistles)

Eddy: YEAH BABY!

Ed: I want a piece of that.

Kevin: Lookin' good Nazz.

Peter: YOU SUCK!


	19. Part 19

Ben: Come on Grandpa. Why can't we be on Silent Library?

Grandpa Max: First of all because you're both too young. And second, you can't get along with other contestants. Remember the time when you were on The Price is Right?

(Flashback)

Bob: Alright, let's start the bidding. Jimmy Neutron, how much do you bid on the flat screen TV?

Jimmy: $675 Bob.

(Beep)

Bob: $675. Mr. Ben Tennyson?

Ben: Uh...$780.

(Beep)

Bob: $780. Starfire?

Starfire: Um? Excuse me but what was the last bid?

Bob: $780.

Starfire: Then I will bid $781.

(Beep)

Ben: (Bleep) YOU.


	20. Part 20

Stewie: Ok. Now to check Dbzfreak60's Fanfiction stories.

Seconds later.

Stewie: Good lord. Christopher Thorndyke from Sonic X and Dora The Explorer together? Hhmmmmmmmmmm. Yes I can imagine a future for those two.

(Imagination)

Chris & Dora were at Chris Thorndyke Jr.'s Grave.

Dora: (Cries) It's just so horrible.

Chris: I'm sorry, Dora. I thought if I shook him enough, he'd stop crying.

He looked at her.

Chris: I was kinda right.


	21. Part 21

Wanda: So Doctor Rip Studdwell? Is Cosmo healthy?

Doctor: My goodness. You'll be dead within a month.

Cosmo and Wanda gasp.

Doctor: Oh sorry. I was reading Garfield comics. HAHA! Oh Garfield. If you keep eating all of that lasagna, you'll be dead within a month.

He puts away the comic.

Doctor: Now on to you.

Cosmo: Well? Am I healthy or not Doc?

Doctor: Ok Cosmo. Let's look at your physical results. AAAUUUGHH

(Gasp)

Doctor: There's a spider in here. Now, here we go. Now Cosmo, you are going to expire in a month.

(Gasp)

Doctor: This is your Driver's License isn't it? Now unfortunately, I'm afraid you're going to die.

(Gasp)

Doctor: When you watch this entire first season of The Wayans Bros.

Wanda: (Screams) WOULD YOU JUST TELL US IF COSMO IS HEALTHY OR NOT?

Doctor: Uh Cosmo? I'm not sure how to say this. THIIIIISS? THESE? THIAGHEES? Never mind. Ok onto the Cancer.

(Gasp)

Doctor: You are a cancer right? You were born in July? Now onto the test results. Oh my. They're much worst than I thought.

(Gasp)

Doctor: Your Godchild Timmy Turner got a D- on his history test. Now Cosmo, that liver's gotta come out.

(Gasp)

Doctor: It's been in the microwave for three minutes now. It'll get dry. Now...

Wanda: Please. We can't take it anymore. Please tell us. Is Cosmo healthy or not?

Doctor: Oh yeah. He's fine. He's just retarded.

Wanda: Thank you.

Cosmo: Wait wait. Hold on a minute.

One minute later.

Cosmo: Did you say I was retarded?

Doctor: Well yeah. After seeing how you are, you are pretty retarded.

Cosmo: UMMM. OK.


	22. Part 22

Velma went to a closet.

Velma: Well well well. Look who's here.

Scooby: rhat are you doing?

She pulled out a vacuum.

Velma: Well. Looks like Mr. Hoover came here to see you, Scooby.

Scooby: Ruh? Ca...Can rou tell him I'm not home?

Velma: He'll leave after he has a little word with you.

Scooby: Relma, this isn't funny. Ri really don't...

She started the vacuum and scared scooby and chased him with it.

Scooby: RRRRRAAAAAUUGH. RAAAUGH. STOP IT. Rit's Scaring me. Get back. I SAID GET BACK. (Roof) (Roof) (Roof) (Roof) (Roof) (Roof) Ro k. ok. I'll give Raggy back to you.


	23. Part 23

Gwen Tennyson came into the room.

Gwen: Yuso, who are these guys?

Yuso: This is Ed. This is Edd. He has two D's in his name. And this is Eddy. So what do you guys do more often?

Eddy: We scam people and buy jawbreakers.

Yuso: Really?

Edd: Sort of.

Yuso: Ed?

Ed: Butter toast.

Yuso: I see.

Yuso took out the trash.

Gwen: Yuso? Did you threw those boys away?

Yuso: No.

Gwen got closer to check.

Yuso: Maybe.

She got even closer.

Yuso: Yes.


	24. Part 24

Jinx and Mammoth were walking up the driveway when suddenly...

Gizmo: JINX. MAMMOTH. UP HERE.

Jinx: What the hell?

Gizmo: GET ME A LADDER OR SOMETHING.

Mammoth: What are you doing up there?

Gizmo: (Sarcasm) TALKING TO MUFASA UP IN THE STARS. WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M DOING? I'M STUCK.

Jinx: How'd you get on the roof?

Gizmo: WHAT AM I DOING? AN INTERVIEW OR SOMETHING? SHUT UP AND GET ME DOWN.

Mammoth: Hear that?

Jinx: Yeah! Maybe we are doing an interview. So Gizmo, tell us about your new science project coming up.

Gizmo: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? GET ME DOWN YOU SCUM BUCKETS!

Jinx: Nope. First you tell us about that new project.

Gizmo: Oh you guys are so dead.

Mammoth: Is that the name of your science project?

Gizmo: GGGGGRRRRRR! Uh, I'm been working on a time machine and so far it's looking very great. TOSS ME A ROPE.

Mammoth: Nope. Not good enough. We want details.

Gizmo: GGGRRR! I'M GONNA SLICK YOUR THROATS IN YOUR SLEEPS. Uh, I'm making a time machine to go see what it's like in the far future. And uh, we all know there's going robots in the future. And I was hoping they won't go bad like those robots in those Terminator movies. And I'll probably go into the past to see what the 90's are all about. Cause you know, rumor has it that some people miss the 90's so much.

Mammoth: I heard that you are starring in your new movie with your co-star, Justin Timberlake. Are you excited working with him?

Gizmo: I DON'T GIVE A (Bleep)ING SH(Bleep) ABOUT JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE!

Jinx: OOOOO! That doesn't sound like an interview answer. Say something nice about Justin Timberlake.

Gizmo: I...think he is fun to work with. And...he is an...awesome singer.

Mammoth: Better Better. So, can you hang with us during the break?

Gizmo: WHAT?

Jinx: We'll be right back Gizmo and his other co-star, Robin Williams.

Jinx and Mammoth walked away.

Gizmo: HEY! I DON'T EVEN LIKE ROBIN WILLIAMS. HEY!


	25. Part 25

An angry mob was approaching.

Peter: See? There's you fans coming over here.

Brian: Uh Peter? Those people aren't Megan Fox fans. That's an angry mob.

The angry mob made it there.

Mayor West: We don't want you in our town fox. We don't appreciate you always taking our stuff.

Swiper: Oh MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!

Mayor West: And as for you Megan Fox, We don't want you here either.


	26. Part 26

Peter: Lois, we can't afford another kid. We already got Stewie, Chris, Sonic, Metal Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Amy, Shadow, Espio, Cream, Cheese, Rouge, Charmy, Big, Omega, Vector, Eggman...

Brian: Uh Peter, those aren't your kids. They're characters from Sonic Heroes.

Peter: Raj, Dwayne, Rerun...

Brian: Those are characters from What Happening!

Peter: Red, Blue, Green...

Brian: Those are colors.

Peter: They are already doing bad things sometimes. And the next thing you know, they'll start doing things illegal. Like that word that's short for Spray painting. Uh (Snap) (Snap) (Snap) Rafeki.

Brian: That's the monkey from The Lion King.

Peter: Spaghetti.

Brian: That's a pasta food.

Peter: Raigeki.

Brian: That's a Yu-Gi-Oh Spell Card. DAMN IT PETER IT'S GRAFITTI!


	27. Part 27

Dbzfreak60's What Really Grinds My Gears

You know what really grinds my gears? The New Cartoon Network. Yeah that's right. I hate it. I was born in the 90's and I can tell that the old Cartoon Network shows and commercials were like really something. The old shows were like rated G and just a few were PG like The Powerpuff Girls. Now, they are giving Cartoon Network bad shows. They are all like PG and PG-13. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU CREATORS OUT THERE? YOU ARE GIVING CARTOON NETWORK A BAD REPUTATION. To me I think. WELL I HOPE EVERYONE AGREES WITH ME. And that's what really grinds my gears. Back to you Tom.


	28. Part 28

Stewie: HHMMMM? My family born with different genders?

He thought it up in a thought bubble.

Stewie: (Scream) Whoa! I never want to think of that again.

His thought bubble came again.

Stewie: Stop it.

It appeared again.

Stewie: Go away damn you.

It appeared again.

Stewie: OH YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT NOW!

He beat it up with a bat.


	29. Part 29

Dbzfreak60's What Really Grinds Her Gears

You know what really grinds my gears? Teachers giving us homework on Fridays. Huh? Well let me tell ya something. Teachers can never give us a break. The more work we do, the more strict our parents get. Have you ever wondered what it's like to have so much homework at once? I know I have once. BUT NOW I SAY DOWN WITH SCHOOL. I COULD'VE BEEN AT DUEL ACADEMY LIKE JADEN YUKI. Wow I wish there was a school like that. THE POINT IS YOU PEOPLE ARE RUINING SCHOOL FOR ME. IF I WANTED TO BE LIKE A HOBO, THEN SO BE IT. I THINK ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN SCHOOL. Back to you Tom.


End file.
